The
Wali
A
wali (guardian)
of the bride
is necessary
to represent
her in concluding
the contract.
The wali is
a male relative
who would
be her guardian
if she were
a minor, for
example her
father. However,
if he is not
available,
a brother,
uncle, grandfather
etc. will
suffice.
If none of
these exist
then a Muslim
ruler or judge,
and if they
do not exist
then a prominent
leader of
the Muslim
community
(see Fiqh
us sunnah,
Syed Sabiq,
Sar al-Kitab
al Arabi,
Beirut, 2nd
ed, 1973,
vol 2 page
120)."No marriage
contract is
valid without
a wali." -
Tirmidhi and
Abu Dawood
"A woman may
not act for
another in
concluding
a marriage
contract,
and a woman
may not conclude
her own marriage
contract."
- Ibn Majah
and Daraqutni.
The Offer and Acceptance
Both offer
and acceptance
must be explicit
in mentioning
the word marriage
(or any other
word in any
language implying
a similar
situation).
Both statements
should be
made at the
same sitting,
i.e. one party
to the other.
The Bride's Agreement
The
bride must
be agreeable
to concluding
the marriage
by her wali.
This agreement
should be
specific to
marrying a
specific man
and all other
conditions,
if any, must
be agreed
upon also.
The Witnesses
At
least two
Muslim male
witnesses
are required
or one male
and two females
- all of them
having reached
the age of
puberty and
being of good
character.
The Sadaq/Mahr
The
Sadaq
or Mahr
(dower) is
a required
marriage gift
given by the
groom to the
bride. It
represents
his commitment
to take care
of all the
family expenses
including
her personal
needs… "And
give women
their dower
as a free
gift."
(surah 4 verse
4)
Sadaq
may be money
or in kind,
but it should
be specified
in its kind
and quantity.
It may be
paid in full
at the time
of the marriage
contract,
or postponed
until a definite
or indefinite
date in the
future. That
which is deferred
becomes due
upon divorce.
The value
of Sadaq can
be anything
from $1 upward
(and must
be agreed
upon by both
parties).
The
Procedure:
-
Witnesses and guests take their seats.
-
The wali of the bride and the groom sit facing each
other,
close
to the
witnesses
so that
they can
be seen
and heard
by the
witnesses.
-
A learned man delivers a short ceremonial speech (see
the khutbah
at the
end of
this article).
-
Then
the wali
of the
bride
addresses
the groom
with the
following
words
or something
similar:
"In the
name of
Allah
the Merciful,
the Mercy
giving,
Praise
be to
Allah,
Lord of
the worlds,
and Prayer
and Peace
be upon
the Prophet
Muhammed,
his family
and the
companions.
I marry
to you
my daughter
(sister/niece
etc -
mention
the full
name)
whom I
represent,
in accordance
with Islamic
Law and
the tradition
of the
Messenger
of Allah
(pbuh)
and for
the Sadaq
agreed
between
us." (details
of the
sadaq
and method
of payment
may be
mentioned).
The groom
answers:
In the
name of
Allah
the Merciful,
the Mercy
giving,
Praise
be to
Allah,
Lord of
the worlds,
and Prayer
and Peace
be upon
the Prophet
Muhammed,
his family
and the
companions.
I accept
to marry
the woman
you represent,
in accordance
with Islamic
Law and
the tradition
of the
Messenger
of Allah
(pbuh)
and for
the Sadaq
agreed
between
us." (details
of the
sadaq
and method
of payment
may be
mentioned).
[This
offer
and acceptance
should
be declared
in the
presence
of the
witnesses,
Allah
is the
best of
witnesses.
By this
the marriage
concluded
and the
bride
and groom
become
husband
and wife].
-
To make the marriage publically it is reccomended
to have
a walimah.
The Prophet
(pbuh)
saw a
trace
of yellow
colouring
on Abd
al Rahman
and asked,
"What
is this?"
He answered,
I got
married.
The Prophet
(pbuh)
said,
"May
Allah
make it
a blesing
for you.
Make a
walimah
even with
only a
sheep."
- Bukhari,
Muslim
and others.
-
The best way to congratulate
the bride
and the
groom
is to
say: "May
Allah
make it
a blessing
for you
and a
blessing
to you
together
with all
that is
good."
- Tirmidhi,
Abu Dawood
The
Marriage Khutbah:
[This
is not essential;
the marriage
will be legal
without it;
however, it
is Sunnah
to have a
Khutbah].
Praise
be to Almighty
Allah, the
Sustainer
of the Worlds
Whom we ask
help and pardon.
We seek refuge
in Allah from
the evils
within ourselves
and from our
evil actions.
He whom Allah
guides no
one can lead
astray and
he who He
leaves in
error has
no one to
guide him.
I testify
that there
is no deity
but Allah
and that Muhammad
is His servant
and His messenger.
Almighty
Allah has
created humanity,
male and female,
each in need
of another,
and has established
the institution
of marriage
as a means
of uniting
the souls
in a blessed
bond of love
leading to
their pleasure
and happiness
in a way advantageous
to humankind.
The
Quran says,
"It
is He Who
has created
man from water:
then has He
established
relationships
of lineage
and marriage:
for your Lord
has power
(over all
things). "
(25:54)
And
He reminds
us of His
great favors:
"And among
His signs
is that He
created for
you of yourselves
spouses that
you may live
in joy with
them, and
He has set
between you
love and mercy.
Surely in
that are signs
for those
who reflect."
(30:22)
And
Peace and
Blessing be
upon His great
and beloved
Prophet and
last Messenger
Muhammad,
who emphatically
urged Muslims
to marry.
He said: "Young
men, those
of you who
can afford
to marry should
do so. Marriage
is the best
check for
lustful eyes
and an effective
help to maintain
chastity."
Brothers
and sisters,
at this auspicious
moment, we
are uniting
in the bond
of marriage
and obedience
to the guidance
of our Creator
and in obedience
to the practice
of our beloved
Prophet (pbuh),
our brother
(his name)
and sister
(her name)
who have decided
to live together
as husband
and wife,
sheltered
with the blessings
of Almighty
Allah and
His divine
Benevolence.
May Allah
fill their
lives with
joy and may
He grant them
peace, health
and prosperity.
May they always
live together
in an atmosphere
of tranquility
and never
diminishing
love and tender
regard for
each other.
